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Monthly Bluster

Naomi the Sensual Senior-#23-No sense of place.

Naomi The Sensual Senior-The Monthly Bluster-#23-Sense of place.
Hey, readers.
Let me introduce myself.
I am Naomi. Cool name, eh? I am a traveling, single, free spirited boho, gypsy like lady, just like my alter-ego, Pamela, this website’s creator and keeper.
I am the voice of Pammyland; Pammy, she is called affectionately by some.
I speak for her, for me, for us.
Us being “Them that’s not-quite-blue-hairs.”
We discussed this ad nauseum, Pammy and I, trying to avoid the obvious and decided that, as much as we hate to open the subject, we must keep relevant, real and on top of topical stuff here on my Monthly Bluster, as much as folks don’t want to discuss reality.
Between us we have studied this in countless articles and stuff on the tube and Net and talked to many, many mature women, so we KNOW we aren’t the only 2 out of the 6,000,000 single women in Canada who have experienced this weird phenomenon.
YESSS we know that all 6,000,000 single women aren’t over 55 and yess, of course we KNOW many, many are not facing anything NEAR this weird new age life of many. And we are SO happy for our sisters that still live that lifestyle of relevance. And are not faced with the disjoint from their kids or others from younger generations. YAY, LADIES! Raise a glass and high fiver.
But, basically, for those who are experiencing the disconnect from the young’uns and the new and unexpected challenges in the financial department, we ain’t talkin’ though our hats (since both of us have several and love wearing said hats!)
After all. We are supposedly the wise ones—so far. While we are still ‘’with it.’
So here we go.
Regarding the ‘’wise ones” moniker that we aging population HAD been deemed in other generations.
Have you found yourself wandering aimlessly? It seems I do that a lot lately.
Forgetting words in the middle of a sentence? That, too.
Chasing rainbows?
Feeling disjointed and unsettled to the max? Yep.
Am I alone in this disjoint?
Is it only me (and Pammy) who feel adrift, purposeless and incredulous at this new me who has come knocking at my door, unbidden?
Do you also feel—bereft? Is that the word? Like we are missing something vital? Not sure of what to do next?
Are YOU made to feel stupid and, Egads, Boomerish?
Invisible at every turn?
Have you heard the words, “OH MOM/Dad?” And seen the faces that see through us and might as well be saying “Well—she/he’s old. What more can you expect?”
Have peeps in your family thrown in the word dementia and Alzheimer’s in passing?
Have you felt that we Boomers don’t seem to be looked at so much as ‘the wise ones” anymore?
Well come on down while I sell you this handy dandy soulmate/save the seals certificate/don’t go to jail if you pay the arrears on your revenue Canada bill?
No—really.
Enough with the jokes. Ok, Ok, I thought a bit of levity might break up the ice of—-irrelevance.
NOPE!!
This ain’t damn funny, this place we recently-senior find ourselves in. It is just plain scary to be young-old. You?
Maybe there is an underlying reason for this mass confusion.
It even has a name.
It’s called “loss of identity.”
In what way, you might ask.
Well, take your pick.
It just might have happened to someone in YOUR family
Seems like yesterday I was humming along, nice home, family, a job I loved. Feeling satisfied and fulfilled.
’member the good old days-like-yesterday, peeps?
In my particular case there was a change in status. Widow got attached to my legals.
Not necessarily the way it went down for some of my peers.
I can’t count on my fingers and toes how many got ‘’the golden parachute’ after they turned 55—as if THAT was supposed to take them to eternity in the style they had been accustomed to and expected to live out after putting 25-30 years into Company A.
And then there was the prize of the GOVERNMENT job! That place you practically had to murder someone to get canned from—-previously.
As for pensions?? PFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!
Manufacturing plants now have no H.R. Department. No paid vacays. No ‘’employees.”
Don’t get me started on the ones who had 2500$ in disability-medical or otherwise-coming in each month. And as soon as they turned 65—GONZO!. Disappeared like a puff of smoke.
They went from a decent lifestyle to under 15,000$ a year. Some under 12,000$ TRY LIVING as a single on, say 13,500 on average a year, unless you are happy with food banks and no car. God forbid you want to take a plane or train to see your grands…
All of a sudden a whole damn bunch of us have gone kicking and screaming into—need. Smacking of dependence.
Reversed roles.
No WONDER we are in a state constant …constant….flabbergastedness!!!
SO—I digress.
All I am saying is that too many of us have gone from happy homes with security and an expectation of living ‘til the average 84 years to traveling from pillar to post, on poverty income, no sense of self AND being looked at as—past it.
Just my thin dime.
Oh, right. Loonie..
Ok, Ok, Twoonie..
Sigh…
Naomi

3 Comments

  • Reply Van Pittsenbargar October 24, 2017 at 5:54 pm

    Reading this was a pleasant sobering affirmation of what I (although a 61-year-old man) have been feeling lately, but also confirmation that there is a group into which we fit, an ever-growing group. It has come on slowly, each day another straw in a weighted basket we carry around as a reminder of how we may have felt an integral part of a large close group. And as we age the group fell away as disinterested acquaintances too busy to stay in touch, ever dwindling until we often face current days totally alone wondering if we were really important at all or if we were merely working so hard to be a part of the whole that we thought there was a “whole”. But the group of loners is growing, and that whole is more tangible. Thank you for putting to words what so many of us feel. It was a refreshing and reassuring tribute to all us out here.

  • Reply katou October 24, 2017 at 7:20 pm

    Maybe the trick to it all is what we convince ourselves or how much we convince ourselves will determine our happiness as old farts .I suppose a warning to the young in’s is appropriate . Hey kids , if you cant like farts ,don’t get old …. OK then the money part . Choose your toy’s and necessities careful . Snowshoes and cab’s are cheaper to maintain later on in life when you no longer have control of how much work you need to perform to produce the cash you need to keep it going . katou

    • Reply Pamela October 25, 2017 at 7:25 am

      You made some great points here, Katou!

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